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Thursday, October 11, 2012

Mom Angst

My nights have been sleepless lately. My 19 year old son has been on a mission to live life his way. I know I shouldn't worry, that worry is wasteful. I know that prayer is the best thing I can do but at the end of the day when your super smart little boy is making decisions that don't seem so smart, it is impossible to quiet the voices in your head saying "what if?". He left last night to go to his newly acquired house three hours away. No job, no money in the bank and no cell phone (he lost that on Monday and didn't have it insured). This time last year he decided college wasn't for him. I left home at 19 as well. I had a job, I had a plan and I had goals. I was in college and remained there until I graduated. Maybe this is my reward for tormenting my parents.
I know I need to let go. Many people have left other countries to come to America. They too had nothing and were able to start from scratch and become successful. The world is different now. Hardworking successful adults are struggling. Ugghhh! It's good to let it go. To let him go.
I would love to hear some happy endings of other's teens who are now very sane, stable and successful. And I'll receive all the prayer's I can get. :)

3 comments:

  1. You know I am praying for you and for your sweet son. This is a good thing although it doesn't feel so good right now. I remember my best friend leaving college after the first semester freshman year. She did eventually get a degree in her late 30's. Another friend stayed at college for 3 days then came home. He now has a family of his own and has a stable job which more than many college graduates can say! God's ways are not our ways and our kids have to find their own way with His help. Let peace reign in your heart and love abound!

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  2. So stressful! Hope things stabilize soon.

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